Le Jardin de ma Vie: Day 20: July and August

My farmer and I dated for five years before we got married. The entire time we lived 45 minutes to an hour apart.

I didn't mind much. We saw each other most weekends and talked on the phone during the week. The distance allowed me to develop as an individual. I got to make my own decisions and form my own friendships. He was close enough to help in a crisis, but far enough away that I learned to be self-sufficient.

Our first month of marriage was an adjustment. I had to get used to seeing him everyday in addition to sharing a home and the decisions that accompany every day life.

And then he was gone.

We got married in March. We probably had three or four weeks after our honeymoon before spring fieldwork started. I didn't see him most of April, May, or the first couple weeks of June.

During the day he was busy supporting his seed business customers. He delivered corn and soybean seed to his farmer customers and helped plant plots to compare corn hybrid and soybean variety performance. At night, he was busy applying anhydrous ammonia to make sure the corn had the Nitrogen it needed to thrive from the start. He was tilling the soil to prepare the fields for planting. He was helping plant the crops. He was applying herbicides to eliminate weed competition with the crops. And, back then, he was running the field cultivator alongside the growing corn plants to eliminate weed competition mechanically.

Thirteen crops seasons later, I've realized our long-distance courtship prepared me well for his break neck spring and fall schedules. In the spring and fall months (which are just as crazy), my job is to minimize unnecessary stress. I take care of all kid and house stuff. I try not to involve him day-to-day decisions unless it is absolutely necessary. Like the spring I thought I put the spade through our gas line. That was necessary.

I've also realized that July and August are my reward. His schedule is much more flexible. This allows us to travel on a whim, visit with faraway friends, and just enjoy the slower pace of summer.